What is the ethical obligations of a step-father?

i agree with the 50/50 on bills now when it comes to the kids i think you should have some alone time with your kids that don't live at home with you at least twice a month and every other time have everyone together. if you can't afford to take all the kids then you shouldn't take all the kids. your main obligation should be to your own kids 1st then do what you can for the other's while being as fair as you can to them. it is not fair to leave your kids out just to add her kids. when being a step dad your a mentor and a friend . where is there father? i would talk to her about letting there father be more in their lives so as to give you more free time with you own kids. i think you need to sit down with your girl and tell her everything you told yahoo , even the part about money. look if you can't afford to take 9 kids then don't take 9 kids out. wow she can't give you a few dollars from the kids SSI check to treat her kids when you have them all. she sounds a little selfish there. your kids need to know they are still important to you and as a father i feel that's the least you can do